Overcoming Rejection (Part Two)

In Part One of this series, I shared the devastating effect of rejection in human life, and how it is contrary to our inherent qualities as humans. We were built to connect. Disconnection, although has its useful place regarding success, is in opposition to the intense human need for relationships and acceptance.

In part one, I shared that you were designed a giver, meaning that our intrinsic desire to give surpasses our willingness to receive. We share the amazing quality of selflessness with our heavenly father. The selfish desire which has overwhelmed the human race was never a divine intention. Selfishness is never a divine trait, but selflessness is. Selfishness is the gratification of human sinful nature (Galatians 5:16). It is proof of human deviation from his original design. We were built to give, and our fulfilment and joy are also directly linked to this divine quality in us.

Therefore, whenever you give love and receive hate in return, internal disorder sets in. It’s like filling up a diesel car with petrol. There is an adverse reaction. Malfunction becomes inevitable. Something is out order. In the same manner, rejection of any kind generates a negative reaction, capable of bringing about internal disorder which will, in time, become external. But as mentioned in Part One, one of the keys to overcoming rejection is knowledge. When you know how you were made, and why you feel dejected when rejected, you immediately feel better about your rejection. You suddenly realised that you are not weird, because your despondency is a normal reaction to internal disorder caused by rejection. You were built for order by the God of order. Therefore, disorder upsets your in-built passion for order.

Moving on from Part One, your victory over rejection will require you to know who you really are. What is your true identity? You will have to be vast regarding the knowledge of your true identity. If you do not know who you are, you will continue to struggle to win your battle against rejection. If you have sculptured your identity around a love relationship with another human, extreme calamity is inevitable when the person you love turns his back against you.

Likewise, if you derive your identity in your job, you will tumble into depression when your job is taken away from you. If things, places or humans are the sources from where you find your sense of worth, fulfilment and reasons for living, you have misplaced your focus and have positioned yourself for stress (Jeremiah 17:5). It is impossible to win the battle of rejection, if the picture of your true identity is not vivid on your mind.

Now, what is your true identity? Your true identity is this; you are a child of God. This is very crucial, and must be ingrained in your innermost being. You are the offspring of the Most High God, who created the heaven and the earth. You are not your nationality, place of birth, where you live, career, gifting, talent, personality, wealth, , possession, experiences, feelings, connections, your favourite sport team, your human relationships or your family. Rather, you are simply the son or daughter of Jehovah – the One who formed you and gave you life. If you are able to grasp this truth, there is no rejection of man on the earth that will throw you off balance. Why? Because your sense of worth, fulfilment and reasons for living are not connected to things or people, but to your heavenly father.

Just in case nobody else loves and every one decides to reject you, God decided, before the foundation of the earth, to lavish His love toward you. He says He has loved you with an everlasting love and with loving-kindness He has drawn you (Jeremiah 31:3). The love and the acceptance of the whole world, put together, is like a drop in the ocean compared to the love that your heavenly father has bestowed upon you (1 John 3:1). When all your friends have deserted you, your father in heaven says He will never leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6, 8; Psalm 37:25). Likewise, in your brokenness, God says He is with you and will heal your hurts and fill you with His salvation (Psalm 147:3; Psalm 34:18; Psalm 51:17).

Furthermore, in the midst of your life’s challenges, God says He will uphold you with His righteous right hand and strengthen you (Isaiah 43:2; Psalm 23:4; Isaiah 41:10). God is more than everything you will ever need. When you get this fascinating picture into your spirit, you will forever remain unmoved by the rejection of men. The bible say if God is for you, who can be against you (Romans 8:31-32)? He is the One who defends the cause of the fatherless and love the unlovable (Deuteronomy 10:18).

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  • William Joukhadar

    Reply Reply March 28, 2012

    Thank you, Wale

    It is so good to bathe in God’s truth. Before becoming a Christian, I battled against rejection. However, because of Christ, rejection is no longer an issue in my life. There is only One person I look to for acceptance … who will never reject me, no matter what I say or do. That One person is Jesus!


    • Wale

      Reply Reply March 28, 2012

      Hey Bill,
      So nice to read from you. Thanks for reading my blog.
      We are blessed to you have you constant love and support.

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