You Were Designed for Relationships – Part One

God never created anything that does not need something else for its fulfilment. Everything was made for relationship. Nothing on earth was designed to exist in isolation. Your eyes need vision. Your ears need sound. Your body needs food. Fish needs water. Relationship is the heartbeat of life.

Your fulfilment is connected to somebody else. Your success requires somebody. Those who boast about their self-made fortunes are obviously very expressive in their ignorance. Human life relentlessly comes into agreement, knowingly or unknowingly, with other agencies for survival and accomplishment. The entire universe is run by the Law of relationship.

One of the divine purposes of relationship is strength. The bible says,

“Two people can accomplish more than twice as much as one; they get a better return for their labour.  If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But people who are alone when they fall are in real trouble. And on a cold night, two under the same blanket can gain warmth from each other. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.” (Ecc 4:9-12, NLT).

A seed remains powerless until it enters into a relationship with fertile soil. As long as the seed is in agreement with the soil, there is growth, there is multiplication and, of course, there is strength. The little seed germinates and becomes so strong that even the walkway concrete has no choice but to crack in two, to allow further expansion of the seed.

God is a relationship God, and the bible is a book about relationship. We see God exemplifying the law of relationship in His divine purpose for His creations. In Genesis 2:18, God provided a human relationship for Adam.  “And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”

Isolation is defiance against divine intention. God strengthens through relationships but the devil destroys through isolation. If you want to find strength in times of challenges, if you have dreams and goals, and if your desire is to win the battle of life, you will have to see relationships as indispensable gifts from God.  There are people in whose presence your energy unleashes. There are others in whose presence your doubt dies and your faith multiplies.

There are relationships which are crucial to your destiny. For example, David’s relationship with Jonathan was vital on his journey to the throne. Jonathan provided strength and protection when David was on the verge of being destroyed by King Saul. The bible says, “…the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul” (1 Samuel 18:1).

 Nobody succeeds alone. Everybody needs someone. Your divine assignment will always require the relationship of a Jonathan. Remember, even Joseph needed the relationship of the chief butler he met in prison to become the Prime Minister of Egypt (Genesis 40). Your joy and fulfilment will always require quality relationships.

Now, here is the question you might be pondering on right now: is every relationship of God? Or has God orchestrated every relationship in my life, including those ones though which I experienced the most excruciating pain and disappointment? I am a firm believer that when God wants to launch you into a new season of blessing, He brings someone into your life. He allows someone to be part of your dreams and future. However, I am also a strong believer that not all relationships are divinely decided. Some relationships in life are divine decisions while some are human decisions. I personally believe that all your relationships cannot be divinely orchestrated, because God has given every human a free will. you have been authorised to make your own decisions and choose your own friends.

 Secondly, God’s desire is that we learn and develop through the instrumentality of different kinds of people and school of thoughts. God has hidden part of Himself in every human He created. Anybody can be a positive agent for your success. For example, over the years, I have connected with people who were exceptional in their relational skills, but knew nothing about God. So, It would be incorrect to think that only the God’s orchestrated relationships could be a blessing to you.

Relationships which are assigned by divine appointment are often products of prayers, wisdom and obedience to the law of God (love). The bible says, “The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, And He delights in his way” (Psalm 37:23). Obedience to the word of God and favourable behaviours towards others always attract divine favour and human favour respectively. For example, since diligence is a divine trait and strategy for productivity,  if you decide to pursue diligence, you will reap exceptional relationships as your harvest, just as the bible says, “Seest thou a man diligent in his business? he shall stand before kings; he shall not stand before mean men. (Proverbs 22:29 KJV)

On the flip side, the relationship which are not divinely appointed but humanly organised are often products of needs, preferences, circumstances, and attitude. In terms of attitude, excellence draws excellence, while mediocrity attracts mediocrity. Attitude creates access and similarities create comfort. People will always tend towards those relationships that promise what they understand to be comforting. Therefore, your current attitude is deciding who are getting attracted to you or who are getting repelled from you. This is why the bible says, “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24 KJV).

Every relationship has a different reward or consequence. Every relationship in your life has a different purpose and a different impact. Every friendship is never without its idiosyncrasies. Some relationships in your life only make withdrawals, while some make deposits. Some wants what you have earned, while some want what you have learnt. Some want to give love, while others want to be loved. Some are a blessing, while some are not. This is because relationship is so crucial to human destiny that the devil relentlessly seeks to take advantage of it for his destructive purposes. Therefore it is important to continue to ask the Holy Spirit for discernment so as to recognise, not only those relationships which are crucial to your fulfilment, but also the unhealthy ones which do not belong in your future.

If you have been a victim of ungodly relationships in the past, ask the Holy Spirit to heal your wounds and give you a deeper revelation of His love for you. The bible says, “The LORD is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18, NIV).

Are you currently in a relationship that is destroying your passion and focus? Ask the Holy Spirit for wisdom and courage to make scriptural decisions towards your deliverance. Never trivialise the power of godly counsel. Be swift to seek Godly counsel regarding your situation. Safety is one of the rewards of relationship. The bible says, “Where there is no counsel, the people fall; But in the multitude of counsellors there is safety” (Proverbs 11:14 NKJ).

The good news is that, regardless of your past mistakes and flaws, God is passionate at turning what the enemies meant for your down fall to a bridge that connects you to your place of rich fulfilment.

“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28)

In the Part Two of this series, Designed for Relationships, I will be sharing about some of the most important relationships in life. It will be powerful and life changing.

Remain a blessing                   Part Two







  • John Fredrick

    Reply Reply February 26, 2012

    Thanks for the wonderful message.

    May God bless you

    • Wale

      Reply Reply February 27, 2012

      Hey Man of God,
      Thanks so much for visiting our website. Thanks for your nice comment.
      Please keep coming back whenever you can. I have decided to be documenting my thoughts and insights on our website as the Holy Spirit gives me the grace.
      Great job with your ministry. We always hear about it.

      Greetings to your wonderful family.


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